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The Insufficient Homosexual

Stories from a man who fails to meet media expectations of what it means to be gay:
white, frivolous, over sexed yet sexless, shrill, single, stylish, a clown, unimportant, et al.


Domingo09/12/2004

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Rewe�s & empanadas




Since sunday was Fathers day, Beth kicked Carlos out of the house so she and boys could prep dinner and gifts for him. He took John and me out into the city, which worked out for the best because he couldn't get much time off from work, we would end up seeing him least of everyone.

We drove into the city to tour around some, ending up in La Plaza de Armas, the main city square, which is surrounded by government buildings, a cathedral, and office buildings. �The plaza had a very Latin American feel, or at least what I associate as the stereotypes of one. � A grand cathedral (getting repaired/renovated in this case), somewhat grimy looking buildings, dirty looking busses pouring off dark plumes of exhaust, kiosks selling Spanish labeled snacks, occasional folks missing limbs begging for money, crowds of families out for a Sunday afternoon, and a green uniformed Army band playing polkaish music loudly in a large pigeon covered bandstand.

I haven�t been a practicing Catholic in quite a while, but it still felt odd touring a Cathedral while mass was being held, so I didn�t mind that we did little more than stick our heads in then leave. �It was very large, very ornate, and very much a cathedral.

The Museo Hist�rico Nacional is on the plaza as well, so that was our next stop. �It�s in an palace who�s significance I forget, and has dioramas and displays of artifacts from indigenous cultures and colonial times. Different tour books mentioned that it had a Mapuche rewe, a �stairs to heaven,� which I nearly walked right by, since despite the hype the books give it, it�s just sitting in the middle of a room, with no explanation. � Well, if there was a plaque there explaining what it was, I missed it. �It was a small totem pole with notches cut out, looking old and somewhat mysterious.

There was also a temporary display of photographs from various Antarctic expeditions, including maps pointing out Chile�s involvement and claims there. �I left feeling that there�s a certain amount of National pride when it comes to Antarctica.

A relatively short walk from the plaza, giving us practice in jay walking (a necessary survival skill in this city) was the Museo Chileno de Arte Precolumbino. �It housed an impressive collection of Pre-Columbian artifacts from various cultures and civilizations ranging from South America to Mexico.

There were even some ceramic figures that still had a few pieces of gold jewelry attached. Fairly rare, since when the Spaniards spread out and took over, pretty much everything of value was taken, and in the case of gold, melted down, leaving damaged bits of pottery naked and undressed.

My guide books praised the museum with phrases such as �if you only time to go to one museum, make it this one.� It was very good, and quite interesting, but in hind sight, I�m wondering how much the unanimous recommendation has to do with it being one of the few museos in the city with information in both Spanish and English?

After the museos we had a late lunch (well late by my standards, normal by Chilean) at Lo Saldes, a chain restaurant known for their empanadas. The layout of the place suggested a self-service deli, but anyone getting too close to the food would find themselves suddenly blocked by multitudes of eager helpful employees. � Looking around the place, especially at the deserts, I think I mad people nervous, or perhaps the young woman standing next to the display of cakes, torts, and postres always has a look of wide-eyed terror.

In honor of our visit, we had an assortment of empanadas for our meal. �Empanadas de queso (cheese), de queso y cevoya (cheese & onions), de chulpa (corn), de champinelles (mushrooms), and de pina con aji (beef, hard boiled egg, a whole olive (pitted which was apparently unusual) and aji, the ubiquitous national condiment). � It was all good, but the empanadas de queso were fried and proved to be killers. �It felt as if I had gained several dozen pounds by the end of the meal, merely from eating a few small savory filled flops of dough.

The rest of the afternoon was spent back at their house, enjoying a peaceful fathers day and another good meal, but this time home made, and lacking in the deadly fried foodstuffs.


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