Stories from a man who fails to meet media expectations of what it means to be gay:
white, frivolous, over sexed yet sexless, shrill, single, stylish, a clown, unimportant, et al.

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I hate SUV�s and if you drive one, then I hate you to*

In the past few weeks, there has been:
-The Explorer driver who realizing at the last minute that they did in fact want onto the 710 freeway onramp made a wild sharp left turn from the far right lane cutting me and several other cars off, nearly causing a multi car pile up.
-The person in a crowded restaurant parking lot who positioned their tricked out Hummer so that it would take up three regular parking spaces, by parking centrally over the middle space.
-The man driving some generic silver over-sized thing who was so busy talking on his cell phone that he could barely concentrate enough to stay in his own freeway lane and almost hit cars in the adjacent lanes.
-The behemoth driving, cell phone talking while driving man who apparently annoyed with me for not speeding fast enough, stayed on my ass playing chicken for several miles instead of merely switching over to the empty fast lane so he drive however the hell fast he wanted.
-The man who parked his hummer with its Jesus fish and praying Calvin stickers in the rear window so that it took up both a regular parking space and a good section of a handicapped space.
-The other Jesus fish labeled behemoth driver who positioned his toy an inch from my car making it impossible for me to get in from the drivers side door.
-The woman in the Saturn whatever the heck you call it, who decided to stop in the middle of the entrance to a Trader Joes parking lot and wait for a parking space to open up. Her fun parking strategy blocked that entrance causing a back up of cars both on the street and in the lot, effectively blocking anyone trying to pull out of a parking space.
-The guy causing a traffic jam in a parking garage by trying to squeeze his tank of a vehicle into a compact space. Worse, it was clear that they were many open spaces on the next level.
-The man who got angry with me after nearly running me over because of my arrogance both in crossing the street at a crosswalk while the �it�s OK to cross� signal was lit and in my assuming that just because the cars in the other lanes had stopped for the red light, that he would to.

*Well, OK, maybe not you specifically, but dang it, can�t you keep your brethren in line?

-nico the annoyed.

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