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Stories from a man who fails to meet media expectations of what it means to be gay:
white, frivolous, over sexed yet sexless, shrill, single, stylish, a clown, unimportant, et al.
12/12/2005
26 lies about 26 men.
E is for Ethan
11/04/05:
I know my boss Cruella hates me because IM gay. She axually wants me to work inventory next Friday night! Thats teh same night as Inuendos Best Chest contest! Just because she is a dried up old homophobic hag with no social life, she expects me to spend my<> night counting T-shirts instead of scoring with other hawt bois. I still have one sick day left. I think I feel a FEVER coming on. Cough! Cough!
Posted by ETQueeRYboi1985 at 3:12pm- 9 comments-link to this post
11/01/05:
OMG! School SUX!!!<> FUKC!!!
Posted by ETQueeRYboi1985 at 10:10am- 20 comments-link to this post
10/08/05:
Corey took us to Trunks last nite. Surprise, it was filled with cute bois for once! Except for the usual fat old daddy types hanging out at the bar that is. They were probably trying 2 score with some fresh young boi like me, but I would say No way! U is 2 old for me Mr. Geritol! LOL!!!
As usual Mez and Danny were there. They R always at Trunks. They practically live there. And Y Trunks? RUFFR?? Inuendo is so much better! Any1 can tell U that!
Anyhoo, there was this 1 hawt boi on the dance floor who was worth my attention, but I lost him when they cut the music for a drag show. Why do places always do that! Just when you get into a groove, they mess everything up with some stupid drag show, and always for an AIDS fundraiser! I am so over AIDS! OK, a bunch of fags like died before I was even born, but theres the cocktail and drugs now. its not like its still a big problem. If they had to stop the music Y couldn�t they have a wet jockey shorts contest instead? That would be cool, but this was just some old black dude in a dress pretending to sing moldy old songs no one gives a FUKC about.
Mez said that he could not deal without some chemical assistance, xcept he said it like �comical mah-ASS-is-tense!!!� WTF? Gawd he SUX! I went with him to the bathroom to get a sample of his wares and Danny gave me a dirty look. What a jealous little princess. As if. I am so out of Mezs league. IM young blond thin & waay hawt. He is short hairy Lebanese or Armenian or some weird thing like that, and worst of all, hes uncut and thats just gross.
Anyhoo, after we finished, we left the stall and washed our hands like good boys. There were these old dudz talking by the sinks. Its pathetic when old men try to hang onto their lost youth. Any1 over 30 is 2 old 2B wearing jeans that low cut! I dont care how skinny he is, that look only works with young dudz like me. Anyhoo, 1 of them, this dud with a shaved head to hide that hes going bald starts talking to me. He gave me a cig, told me IM a cute kid and axked my name, so I tell him its Ethan, and then he axks me, so Ethan, how old are you? 23? 24? The bitch!
I yelled at him that I am no way that old! I am only 20, and I am not interested in his saggy old cunt so just leave me the hell alone! His friends were all laughing and even worse he started laughing too and going all �dont worry, 23 is still young!� WTFF!!!!!!
I left before I slapped her. Mez of course has to tell everybody about it afterwards and the rest of the night they were all �do you need to change your Depends?� Gawd my friends are such total PITAS! Danny was the worst, so I started flirting with Mez to get back at her. ODL I hope Mez doesn�t think I like him 4realz! EWW!
Posted by ETQueeRYboi1985 at 12:08pm- 11 comments-link to this post
10/05/05:
My fugly roommate Sam is mad at me again. Just cause I dont want to go to campus with him tonite for some stupid pro gay marriage rally. Like I care about gay marriage. Its so stupid. Why do all these fagz want to get married anyway? Who do they think they are, Lezbianz? I dont even know any dudz in a long-term relationship. Well, xcept for Sam and Todd, and they dont count cause they are Losers, always talking about how much they <3 each other. Please, the only reason those 2 fagttz R still 2gether is cause they are both so ugli nobody else wants them. If they were better looking they would have cheated on each other by now and broken up like normal fagz. Its a scientific fact that the fagz like teh cex 2 much 2B monogamous, so Y try to B like teh straits and get married?
Everybody hates us now cause gay activists keep pushing for us to get married! AFAIC those activist types R just selfish. There R so many more important things than marriage to worry about, like not getting fired from your job 4 being gay and stuff. Sides, even if I had a serious boifriend, I would be a sad fukcr if I needed a piece of paper to validate my relationship. Anyhoo, why go to some boring fagz rally when I could go to BOITOY! nite at Inuendo with Corey?
Posted by ETQueeRYboi1985 at 4:05pm- 9 comments-link to this post
10/01/05:
Corey and I got so fckd up last night! We drank beers, lit a couple, and watched fukced up old slasher movies. It was great, cept that he was looking me all funny again. She needs a BF and fast! No, a boifriend would take up 2 much of his time and until I get a car again I need him. Corey just needs to get laid ASAP, by someone else that is. LOL!
Posted by ETQueeRYboi1985 at 10:32pm- 15 comments-link to this post